So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
