Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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