And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
