Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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