People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
You're a waste of cheezeits
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
