Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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