I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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