Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
