Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
