If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize