is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
