I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
why do cheetos always look like penises
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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