you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
