Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
