It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
