Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
