There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
