It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
she told me i tasted like america
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
