He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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