there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I wish there were birth control emojis
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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