Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize