Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize