Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
