We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
