I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
