Taylor Swift is so right about you.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
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