Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
