it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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