I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
