Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
