I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
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