Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I touched a dick in church today
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
