apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
