He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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