Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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