If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
