put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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