this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
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