If i come over, it means nothing
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Randomize
