saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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