Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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