I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
We are all done wearing pants today
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Randomize
