im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
