I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
