her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
