These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
