After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
