Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize