You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
