therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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